While surfing through the net, i i stumbled upon a study that claims 80% of people end up recreating the relationships they've grown up in. For example, a child surrounded by domestic violence, is highly prone to becoming a violent person in a relationship or is attracted towards getting into a relationship with a physically violent person.
The study made me think whether my previous relationships are a classic example of such toxic Relationships. The despair and coldness between my parents while i was a child could be suggestive of how easily i could turn callous or numb to the emotions involved in my own life.
Drinking has always been a family issue and we've been affected dramatically because of it. Knowing that, i don't shy away from few pegs of single malt once a week, does it mean I'm going down as well?
My last relationship was beautiful and i didn't want anything but to be with her for the last three years. we were close and it was truly magical. I'm scared that I'll ever find something like that ever again. I'm scared that I truly ran out of that, that kind of emotional availability.
So, the obvious choice I'm left with here is to stay off any substantial knots. Maybe that explains my fear of getting hitched as on the back of my head I'm prepared for it to collapse.
Yeah,
I'm better off these strings, better alone than ruin more lives.
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