Run away coward.

they say lying isn’t the wisest thing to do….so do I...
I’ve my faith in truth, I believe the right way is sure the toughest one and reaching your destination might take a hell longer then the short cuts. As my father say’s “Nothing comes for free neither there’s any short cut to success”.

True that… but Sometimes…. In some critical situations you may have to cover up the truth. As a human species, sometimes I have anger issues. No, it has nothing to do with my “so called attitude”.  I was born with my attitude but anger was a gift from my circumstances. And when my anger comes between me and my beloved one’s I tend to leave. Yes, I run out of situation, I run away from the argument, because nothing is bigger than a relationship for me, and I know if my anger splashes out of my mouth, it is going to be a fucking acid rain. And I don’t want it. in 12^th standard my chemistry professor told me, “ Yeshu, your anger is like water, when it touches the boiling point it’s good enough to burn a human soul, but the good thing about water is that it’ temperature go back to normal easily.”  That day I realized my anger will calm down after a moment, but the words come out of my mouth will never go back to where they came from. On those moments I do make silly excuses and try to quit the situation. If that makes me coward, than be it…!

I’m not attached to the situation or the anger but only the person. Yes I feel hurt, yes I feel faithless, but I gulp up the pain in order to save the relationship I hold with the person.


 
   

Ages...

It’s not that I’ve completely moved on over my social life or my friend circle or dates,
It’s just that I don’t find it interesting anymore, I’ve seen places, I’ve done Stuff, Sometimes it feels like there’s nothing left to see in this mortal life.
Or maybe I’m so consumed with my work that I ignore the fact that even I could enjoy a drink with buddies or a fancy dinner with a girl.
A friend did said and i think she was right up to some point that I need a shock. Not like an electric shock, even if I desire one cause I’ve never had one, silly. I do need a shake, something beyond box, something beyond my limits, something beyond my thinking, something that I could dream about but never fulfill.
Or maybe they are just those expectations I had with world that were never rewarded.

One could say that I’m interested in someone or something until I’m mystified, the moment I figure out a person’s real face beneath the mask, I’m no more interested. I can relate myself to the beast that attacked on the only thing that moves in an incredible manner.
I remember that one time a girl asked me, “How can I chain up a monster like you.”
I simply answered,” Keep surprising me, and I’ll be around you even if you try to run away from me...”

Mai chala,
Chalta gya is ummeed me,
k koi rok lega kandhe pe hath rakhke,
K koi tok dega kehkar bhahut chal liye,
ruk jao yaha kuch pal tum,
Yaha hum hai mai or tum,
Yehi to manga tha tumne duaaon me,
fir kyu beh rahe ho tum hawaao me,

Phir Aankhe khuli  sab dhuaa ho gya,
Mai chala itna gum mukaam ho gya,

rahat ki chahat me aahat ko taras gaye,
Piche na aage ab rab k bhi daras gaye,
Badal  sab hare hum ashkon me baras gaye,
Tera chehra tere kisse teri bate tere lafas gaye….

  

Motives

Sometimes i think everything happens for good reasons but then i couldn't find either of good or bad reasons for my present....
I realized few people i used to call friends, had only motive to use me or my belongings for their own motives. After a brief moment i got the exact pattern they use in steps.
1. Hey buddy what's up.
Ans. Fine, what about you.
2. How have you been dude you look so dull. Lost weight or what?
Ans. I'm pretty much alright.
3. How's your entrepreneurship going?
Ans. As every starter's does, struggling stage.
4. Hey listen can i borrow your car for sometime, I've this hot date tonight and i want to make it special.
OR
Dude i need a favor, can  you lent me some money i need to pay my tuition fee.
(And i feel like yelling, you're living on your father's money in another state just because your girl lives there and lying to your father about your coaching bullshit, seriously...)

I don't mind helping someone for a good cause, if one could just come straight to the point and cutting the *i missed you* crap. If you missed me, you would've called me when i needed *you*, not what you own.

Maybe I'm the rotten one, being cheated so many times, i feel like everyone needs everyone just for favors,

Maybe I'm the fault...